There is no doubt that all of us have had to undergo some form of emotional anguish at some point in our lives. Close relatives, friends, spouses and all that we hold dear have the potential to cause us emotional pain. While we may not have the ability to control what others say about us or do to us we have the power of controlling how we respond. There are many different ways of overcoming hurt and pain.
It is important to appreciate that the healing process takes time. In some cases, it also involves making sacrifices and working hard towards recovery. If you are in a conflict situation, your first step should be to get out of it; walk away. The importance of this is that it gives you time to cool off and to take charge of the situation. If this does not happen, there is a risk of being involved in unpleasant impulsive behavior.
Take time to reflect on the situation. Let the events play out in your mind taking note of what role you and the other party played in creating the conflict. Ask yourself whether you responded appropriately in the situation and whether there is any different way you would have acted. In some cases, the feelings may become even deeper at this point in time. The important thing is to remain calm and to exercise restraint.
After the period of reflection you will be ready to meet the other individual. Many times, our hurt is the result of misinterpreting facts in spite of good intentions from them. Have a mindset that can readily accommodate divergent views so as to understand what it is they meant exactly. Getting a clarification means that you should be ready to listen.
Do not aggravate a situation that is already strained. You need to think carefully before you say anything and try as much as possible not to be aggressive or argumentative. Forcing an apology is not advised as it rarely works. In any case, some may apologize but this is not likely to be genuine. For those that chose to do it out of their own volition, forgiving and forgetting should be the objective.
At times, it is not possible to meet the people that wronged us and reconcile. They may be too hostile or the opportunity may be long gone. Even when this is the case, there are several things that we can do to get rid of the pain in our hearts. One of them is focusing our minds on the positive things that are happening in our lives. We may dwell to long in the past and forget to enjoy our blessings.
Take responsibility and stay in control of the situation. People who keep allocating the blame to other people feel worse and tend to take longer to heal than those who accept some responsibility. Remember that by taking responsibility you regain control and you can, to a large extent, determine what you feel about the situation.
Make a point of sharing the problem with a close friend or relative. Sharing will help you vent and get rid of negative thoughts. Friends help us in understanding situations from different perspectives. You may realize that you really should not be harboring your current feelings.
It is important to appreciate that the healing process takes time. In some cases, it also involves making sacrifices and working hard towards recovery. If you are in a conflict situation, your first step should be to get out of it; walk away. The importance of this is that it gives you time to cool off and to take charge of the situation. If this does not happen, there is a risk of being involved in unpleasant impulsive behavior.
Take time to reflect on the situation. Let the events play out in your mind taking note of what role you and the other party played in creating the conflict. Ask yourself whether you responded appropriately in the situation and whether there is any different way you would have acted. In some cases, the feelings may become even deeper at this point in time. The important thing is to remain calm and to exercise restraint.
After the period of reflection you will be ready to meet the other individual. Many times, our hurt is the result of misinterpreting facts in spite of good intentions from them. Have a mindset that can readily accommodate divergent views so as to understand what it is they meant exactly. Getting a clarification means that you should be ready to listen.
Do not aggravate a situation that is already strained. You need to think carefully before you say anything and try as much as possible not to be aggressive or argumentative. Forcing an apology is not advised as it rarely works. In any case, some may apologize but this is not likely to be genuine. For those that chose to do it out of their own volition, forgiving and forgetting should be the objective.
At times, it is not possible to meet the people that wronged us and reconcile. They may be too hostile or the opportunity may be long gone. Even when this is the case, there are several things that we can do to get rid of the pain in our hearts. One of them is focusing our minds on the positive things that are happening in our lives. We may dwell to long in the past and forget to enjoy our blessings.
Take responsibility and stay in control of the situation. People who keep allocating the blame to other people feel worse and tend to take longer to heal than those who accept some responsibility. Remember that by taking responsibility you regain control and you can, to a large extent, determine what you feel about the situation.
Make a point of sharing the problem with a close friend or relative. Sharing will help you vent and get rid of negative thoughts. Friends help us in understanding situations from different perspectives. You may realize that you really should not be harboring your current feelings.
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