We each have these critical moments that we reach in our lives. Sometimes, for some, it really happens sometime sooner than later. For others...it takes years on years to reach that place. But we all reach that place. We all come to a point where we know, deep inside the midst of our hearts, that things must change. This wish for change is like nothing you've experienced before. There truly is a different form of energy to it. There's a different feeling to it altogether.
You should do the scariest thing there is - face your greatest nightmare...yourself.
My moment came in late 2011 which wasn't by choice. I recollect standing in that flat, hearing words that I wouldn't forget, and literally watching myself from above crumble. I changed everything about myself in that minute. I compromised. I did anything and everything I could. In the final analysis, I'll never forget that feeling of turning to ashes. It wasn't the moment of losing myself that did it, no, that was just the match. It was actually the whole piling up of dry leaves and hay from years of neglect...and that small match was everything in took to spark something that would redefine me from that moment on.
That was only the start, 7 days later, it reached its low point. Definitely dead rock bottom. I made a request to the heavens in that pitch black dark room, it wasn't granted, and I woke up late the following day gazing at a crumbled landscape...with the awareness that I could rebuild my entire world the way in which I wanted it.
But I would need to face myself.
More importantly, I would really need burn everything down that I ever supported myself with. I would need to learn how to support myself for once, to not blame everything on everyone else, to be fully responsible for my whole life, and to ultimately let everything that was locked up and caged in me out. It had to all come out.
You see, when you build walls to keep things out, you also build walls to keep the wonderful things in you from ever reaching any person out there looking to love you. Love was walled in...hurt was walled out. Discomfort was kept away from me...joy remained covered under the dust. I ran from fear...so my certainty and grounding evaded my life like the plague. I had to tear everything down. I had to tear my ego down. I had to tear down my projections. I had to rip apart everything and start over completely.
I did exactly that. I started writing. I started being truthful about what was going on with me. I built everything back, carefully, brick by brick on a different foundation. My backbone and my heart would be the dense iron place from which I could create.
What I realized on the way was this - those places you are afraid to go, this is where your nightmare lives. It crawls around in that space. It's this thick dark leaking sort of agony that will frighten you to death. It frightens you because it makes you think that if you go there you will get caught in it and drown. The reality is, that's where your strength is. There's unthinkable amounts of strength in going there. Just as there's strength in great faith and light, there's equal amounts of strength in going to the place that ravishes your heart with fear...and yet when you go through those places you develop this kind of belief in yourself that is beyond confidence. It's the sort of feeling that you know that everything around you could eventually be demolished, and you most definitely could build it all back no matter the situation.
Power.
Real power.
"Take from me everything world, and I am going to come back and build it back better...and regardless of how you challenge me...I may continue to shine. "
Face your worst nightmare. Face your fears. Do not ever be frightened to let everything go for the chance to build it back better. Want love in your life? You really are going to have to let go of everything on the opposite end that has been hindering you. You are going to have to dive deep ...down into the abyss of your soul, lantern in hand, without the conquering sharp blade. No shields. No weapon. No attempt to rise up above it.
You must go in naked and exposed.
You'll come out. You will cry, suffer, and hurt...but you will surely come out. I'd never tell you to go anywhere that you could not come out of. I assure you, this is the one place you must go for everything to release. To build something new, to begin living the grandest journey you could really ever live...you have to go here. The shadows. The depths. The darkness.
I promise you...this place, is where life starts.
You should do the scariest thing there is - face your greatest nightmare...yourself.
My moment came in late 2011 which wasn't by choice. I recollect standing in that flat, hearing words that I wouldn't forget, and literally watching myself from above crumble. I changed everything about myself in that minute. I compromised. I did anything and everything I could. In the final analysis, I'll never forget that feeling of turning to ashes. It wasn't the moment of losing myself that did it, no, that was just the match. It was actually the whole piling up of dry leaves and hay from years of neglect...and that small match was everything in took to spark something that would redefine me from that moment on.
That was only the start, 7 days later, it reached its low point. Definitely dead rock bottom. I made a request to the heavens in that pitch black dark room, it wasn't granted, and I woke up late the following day gazing at a crumbled landscape...with the awareness that I could rebuild my entire world the way in which I wanted it.
But I would need to face myself.
More importantly, I would really need burn everything down that I ever supported myself with. I would need to learn how to support myself for once, to not blame everything on everyone else, to be fully responsible for my whole life, and to ultimately let everything that was locked up and caged in me out. It had to all come out.
You see, when you build walls to keep things out, you also build walls to keep the wonderful things in you from ever reaching any person out there looking to love you. Love was walled in...hurt was walled out. Discomfort was kept away from me...joy remained covered under the dust. I ran from fear...so my certainty and grounding evaded my life like the plague. I had to tear everything down. I had to tear my ego down. I had to tear down my projections. I had to rip apart everything and start over completely.
I did exactly that. I started writing. I started being truthful about what was going on with me. I built everything back, carefully, brick by brick on a different foundation. My backbone and my heart would be the dense iron place from which I could create.
What I realized on the way was this - those places you are afraid to go, this is where your nightmare lives. It crawls around in that space. It's this thick dark leaking sort of agony that will frighten you to death. It frightens you because it makes you think that if you go there you will get caught in it and drown. The reality is, that's where your strength is. There's unthinkable amounts of strength in going there. Just as there's strength in great faith and light, there's equal amounts of strength in going to the place that ravishes your heart with fear...and yet when you go through those places you develop this kind of belief in yourself that is beyond confidence. It's the sort of feeling that you know that everything around you could eventually be demolished, and you most definitely could build it all back no matter the situation.
Power.
Real power.
"Take from me everything world, and I am going to come back and build it back better...and regardless of how you challenge me...I may continue to shine. "
Face your worst nightmare. Face your fears. Do not ever be frightened to let everything go for the chance to build it back better. Want love in your life? You really are going to have to let go of everything on the opposite end that has been hindering you. You are going to have to dive deep ...down into the abyss of your soul, lantern in hand, without the conquering sharp blade. No shields. No weapon. No attempt to rise up above it.
You must go in naked and exposed.
You'll come out. You will cry, suffer, and hurt...but you will surely come out. I'd never tell you to go anywhere that you could not come out of. I assure you, this is the one place you must go for everything to release. To build something new, to begin living the grandest journey you could really ever live...you have to go here. The shadows. The depths. The darkness.
I promise you...this place, is where life starts.
About the Author:
Evan Sanders is the author of The Words Of Encouragement, a website dedicated to bringing the best quotes, motivational content on the web, and blogs all to one place. Need some more motivation and encouragement to keep moving forward? Dig into these life is too short quotes for a little bit of perspective on why you should drag yourself out of the darkness.
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